Devotion 366 - faith

I didn’t like it much when the preacher said faith is “not” a feeling.

Gee, I wish it was. I like feelings. I am a touchy feely person.

I love getting up early in the morning and feeling the warm carpet beneath my feet.  I love the way warm tea feels as it slides down my throat.  I have a jacket I just purchased, not at all based on how it looks but 100% how it feels.  My son said, “it is half alpaca, half lama and 100% polyester, and exactly the way all jackets should ever feel, Amen.  I believe this jacket will be in heaven.”

I was not at all opposed to shutting off the car when the preacher was talking what faith is not.  I struggle enough with what faith is, much less what it isn’t.

I ran into my appointment.  I waited for a good long while in the lobby.  I was to see a client,  one I hadn’t seen for over a year.  It suddenly occurred to me that I had no memory of what the client looked like.   This has happened before.  I stand there, hoping and praying my client appears with a hand extended and even better, saying my name. It has happened when he or she comes out in an entourage and I have to gamble who it is I know in the group.  I stink at this. 

The client arrived, thankfully solo.  We did our tour, looking at the business of the day and then arrived back in the office.  We said our pleasantries and then out of the corner of my eye I spotted a breathtaking photo.  The memories came back.  The child is a photographer.  I revisited the same pleasant conversation I had had a dozen months before.

The client brightened.  We arrived at a sweet spot.

Out of the desk came a large book, a Christmas gift from the talented daughter photographer.  He held it and opened it with relish.

Every page another breathtaking photo and interwoven, scripture.

I was overwhelmed and speechless.  I read each scripture quickly not wanting to take too much time.  I stopped at a favorite and said, “do you keep it in your desk for bad days?”  On a bad day, I was sure this is exactly what I would want to be looking at.

He closed the book, I thanked him and we parted.

Faith is not a feeling, but when you share it, there is nothing like it.

I could not have picked my client out of a crowd, yet there is this crazy something we share, faith.  

Hebrews tells us, faith is the “confidence in what we hope and the assurance of what we do not see.”  It is knowing under the cover of what we cannot see and do not recognize that God is supremely present, He is supremely good and He is unquestionably powerful.  Able to do all things, in all places for all that love and believe in the power of His redemption according to His will.

I don’t understand this thing called grace.  I can’t describe it.  It is this crazy something that feels too good to be true, yet it has truth stamped all over it.  So I wonder when I wake in the morning and attempt to order my day, does He actually see my face, or is he looking at the photos of the day before and the pictures of the events to come writing His name on it, hoping I will get a glimpse of the glory. 

You see I stop too quickly.  I take on the burdens of the day as if they were mine to carry.  I plug in the calendar the things of tomorrow as if I am guaranteed those moments.  He on the other hand says we must learn to number our days so we can see Him in the here and in the now;  so that we will recognize Him in forever.

My little girl up early at the breakfast table screams and runs for the dining room.  I have no time for this 11-year old drama so I put my tea cup away and head for the stairs.  Twenty-two minutes to dress and ready the kindergartner.

She screams again and insists, “you don’t want to miss this!!”

Five deer have found their way to my backyard.  The little girl grabs my camera.  Right now, beauty.  Right now, grace.  Right now, the world stands still and we watch His creation without thought of schedule.

Oh for every moment to be like this.  For every thought to be captive to His grace and His goodness.  For every frame of my life to be scripted with His hand on the pen.

I get it.  Faith is not a feeling it is firm, it is foundational, it is for now and forever.  It is what makes the worst bearable and the best divine.

By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God’s command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible. Hebrews 11:3