Devotion 398 - good bye

You walk them in and a wee little piece of your heart stays behind. For the first time all my people are in school all day.

 

Taking my son to college; taking my daughter to kindergarten, pieces of my heart fall behind on the sidewalk.  I see them there and they hurt.

I see my son’s apartment.  I love his desk.  Small parts of our life on display; big portions of his life are blossoming. I wonder what parts we have planted, what parts have helped him grow,  and it makes me pray. Hard.

My little daughter told me all summer she could not imagine having lunch without me.  And now, every night she cannot wait to pack her lunch.  She cannot wait to eat with her new friends.  Her single disappointment has been that school doesn’t last until supper.

 

She has reminded me fiercely that I said school would be all day and “all day means until dinner.”  Other than my certain faux pas, she has loved every minute of school.  It is me that is not adjusting.

It is not the heartstrings that are pulled taut, it is my mind, and the things that I hold are true have been torn and turned upside down.

My oldest son and my youngest daughter have some extraordinary things in common.  It is when I say good-bye to them and hug them tight I see those things take life and breath and they teach me.

These two people see good in almost all things.

Seeing good is a gift.  I do not always see good.  I often miss good.  I am learning when I don’t see good, I need to seek good, because good is absolutely what God promises.

I have walked to my car this first week of school after dropping off my girl absolutely sure someone or something will take my daughter’s perspective away.  She is a good seer and I wonder what has clouded my vision.  Likewise my oldest son can talk about friends, football, grades and girls and see light and hope and joy and peace.

 

The lines between good and evil get hard.  The plumb line seems increasingly skewed and my ability to see good seems increasingly hard.

Most of the time I feel old fashioned in my adherence to truth; sometimes I just feel old.

Abraham was old.  Abraham was approaching a century but held on to truth and good and holy.  The Word says, he remained unwavering.  I love that about him,

 He did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised.  Romans 4:20-21

God had not promised Abraham wealth or fame, let’s face it at 100-years old, that’s not impossible.  God promised a family and fatherhood to a man and his wife who was laughingly passed child bearing years.

But Abraham remained UNWAVERING.  He knew His God, our GOD is good and Abraham gave Him space to show the world God’s brand of miraculous good.

I want to look at life unwavering.  That perspective is an absolute game changer.  Take a deep breath Beloved and look at what you face.

Perhaps you have an unlovely child, a frustrating spouse, you soldier through wearying work or suffer through failing health.  Are you helpless or are you hopeful?  Is bad pushing you to despair or can you find a shred of strength to seek good?  That good is not for you to write or even believe, it is for you to seek and know that God’s version of good is miraculous.

I limit Him, I frame Him, I see Him in the high and low and wide that I can see and understand.  He sees big.  He works big. He has already written the end and is ready to rock our beginning.

We have to let Him.  We have to believe in our worst moment, He has only begun.  We have to know our definition does not define Him.

We have to stand unwavering in the good that is perfect, the God that is eternal and extraordinary and abundant.

We have to look not with eyes but with our vision of glory.  He will show us GOOD.

 

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2